bishop

engkau hanya “pendekar” yang digelar askar percaturan petak bersegi empat sama. bukan penting bagi pemerintah seperti dia, just a piece of meat! engkau berkhidmat untuk negara. tak lebih macam prebet lapok di dunia moden ni. dia punya hitam dan engkau punya puteh. ada askar, ada kuda, ada raja dan permaisuri dalam kota kaca. jumlahnya sama tak lebih dan tak kurang satu pun. chup!!! dia ni sape? sape dia yang berdiri sebelah permaisuri tu?!?

“wooo, tu kerani cabuknya…pak mat misai kontot!”

cis, buat suspen aku je. perang pun perlukan pencatat minit ke? wakakaka. terdengkot-dengkot macam mangsa perang sabil je? masih bernyawa? kalo timbang kilo, ada harga ke tu? lagaknya macam pemerintah jugak...mati laaaaa. and chuuuup…!

“erm, apa lagi ni pendekar”
“dia tu sape pulak?”
“ooo...salah info tadi dan itulah paderi (pendita maybe?)”
“aku nak jumpa dia-lah; nak buat confession...pasal ‘dia’ pada paderi”

*gulp

what i have just describe can happen to anyone. i am sure things like this has already happpend to everyone many times and the possibility of these things happening again in the future is certainty.

i learn from my frustrating experiences that things often do not happen according to how i want it to. so in learning this also learn to reduse or avoid more frustrations whenever i can. tetiba saya terdiam hilang kata-kata dalam peti cadangan dia. saya lihat diri ini dalam dia, melalui fasa yang sama 5 tahun lepas. oh, macam ni la “aku” mula-mula nak bertapak dulu. dihina dan dicampak sujud hujung ibu jari kaki cagu pun aku masih lemparkan senyum tanpa prejudis.

the problem lies in our daily wanting, hoping, expecting and looking forward to things. this is the normal way human being live and it is the cause of frustrations. the thing is when we want, hope, expect or look forward to something, we are asking to be dissapointed. things happen and they are not subject to what we want, hope, expect or looking forward to. so when something happen that is not what we want, hope…..forward to, we are frustrated and possibly angry too. the “rain” does not care whether we play or not…it is we who insist that things should be what they are not and we suffer for it.

how can we be frustrated when i do not expect anything?

anything can happen and it does not bother you. but if do not want the thing that is happening and want something else, then you feel frustrated and upset. is this not being foooooooooooolish? hanjing la engkau menghanjing-hanjingkan aku!!!

so you give up as much as possible baldi-gold-so'ot bloody racist :'-{ hopes and expectations. in this way hidup ini ada pasang dan surutnya.

hanya satu perkataan menutup redha segala kekalutan petang ni. “sabar bebanyak yea pendekar”. ilmu kita tak cukup dalam. kekuda dan sesiku semuanya lemah. macam mana nak menangkis serangan musuh? suatu ari pasti terpadam “biara” majussi. bersenjatakan pedang dan tombak mana bleh jalan deeeeeek ~ ngee.